Raccoon Skulls and Such

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4 - So tired

I wound up working until after 10 last night.  Belle woke me up at midnight to go outside.  4:30 comes really early under those circumstances.  I'm tired as hell but I'm still resisting drinking more than my two cups of caffeine.

I've noticed my general mood has greatly improved over the last couple days.  Emotions besides sadness and irritation are much stronger than they were last week.

The writing front seems promising.  I pondered a story idea the entire way to work.  I may even put pen to paper this weekend.  Things are looking up.  All I had to do was stop drowning myself in caffeine every day.

Day 3 - Fuck, I really want some caffeine

My elderly but still spry dog woke me up a couple times last night. My will regarding reducing my caffeine intake is like iron but I'm seriously dragging ass today.  I've got some work to do late tonight so I might have to take a power nap when I get home.

Despite the tiredness, I'm feeling pretty good.  The eye twitch is down to the merest hint and my attitude has greatly improved.  If I'd known cutting back on caffeine would help so much, I would have done it ages ago.

I got a cool Doctor Who notebook in the mail yesterday.

Still haven't written anything though.

Why have you forsaken me?

In a quest not to be so stressed out and irritable, I did some research and found plenty of evidence that too much caffeine increases stress and irritability.  Since I drink a pot of coffee a day, I decided to cut back to one (largish) cup on the way to work.

I'm currently on day 2 and feel a lot better.  I suspect it'll be a few days before I see massive changes but I think I'm on the right track with this.  My eye twitch is almost completely gone and I don't feel like unsheathing my adamantium claws whenever someone talks to me at my desk.

A friend of mine told me he had to cut way back on caffeine for similar reasons around the time he turned forty.  I've got less than a year and a half until then so it seems the time is right.

I want to get back into writing, though.  I dropped down to #10 on the all time Goodreads list over the weekend and it occurs to me that it would be good to get something out there before I fade away.

The Twitch

My eye has been twitching on and off for the past couple months.  I've identified the cause as work stress.  It's hard not to get into a rut after working with the same people for fourteen years.  The sense of achievement is not nearly as frequent as it once was and the avalanche of shit seems to be never-ending some days.  Since I no longer derive a sense of accomplishment from work, I figure it's high time I start writing more.

Most of the articles I've read on burnout and job-related stress sound exactly like what I'm going through.  Since most of them mention turning off your devices and finding some way to get out of your head, I guess that's what I'll do.

Photos for the new year

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